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1 Mommy?! on 4th September 2012, 08:50

July 1955

The little girl with bush hair was dressed up, Anne her nanny had dressed her in the good white dress. Well all her dresses were good, but this one was special, Josephine knew that when she was wearing this dress she would see her mother.

“Anne, when can I see mommy?” Josephine asked curious. She was just five but she understood very well that she couldn’t see her mother whenever she wanted to. She needed to be dressed appropriated and behave very well, not talk too much, the list went on and on.

“You mother is expecting you in seven minutes in the music room. You are supposed to play the harp for her.” Anne fixed Josephine’s hair and then took her hand. “Let’s go. Do you remember what I told you?”

“Mommy want me to call her Mother, to be respectful.”

“That is right. And what else?”

“Only talk when I am addressed. Anne?”

“Yes sweetheart?”

“Does Mother love me? Because she doesn’t do the things a mommy does.” Jo looked with her big brown eyes at her nanny.

“Yes she loves you very much, but she shows it differently than the mothers in your books.” Anne knocked at the door of the music room.

“Enter.” Came the authoritative voice of Lady Elizabeth Williams through the door. “You are early.”

“My apologize Ma’am.” Anne said apologetic.

“Anne I told you that I expect Josephine to be on time that means not to be two minutes early. Sit down Josephine and don’t just stand there!” Elizabeth didn’t even look at her daughter, she just looked with cold eyes at Anne. “Go now!”

Anne bowed to Elizabeth and smiled at Josephine. The little girl waved and blew her a kiss.

“Play!” Elizabeth said loudly at her daughter. Josephine wanted to tell her mother so many things, but in the last moment she remembered what Anne had told her. She started playing the harp without saying a word. The little girl played and played until her mother said cold. “Stop! I can’t listen to this, you have to practise more! Next time I want you to be able to play without mistakes, do you understand me Josephine?”

“Yes mother.” Josephine mumbled.

“Speak up and stop mumbling only the poor mumble.”

“Yes mother.” Josephine said louder.

“Sit down. Did you read any good books lately?”

“Yes mother.”

“Good I told your tutor that you need to read at least three classic a week on your own.”

“Yes mother.”

“Good, do you get enough exercise?”

“Yes mother. Yesterday I was playing in the gardens, and I and Rutschie were hunting invisible butterflies. We were outside until it started to rain and then we went inside and finished Peter Pan and…”

“Stop! What are you talking about who is Rutschie? And why are you reading a book like Peter Pan? You are supposed to read this week Utopia. And what is this nonsense about invisible butterflies?” Elizabeth looked stern at her daughter. “Answer me when I ask a question! You are supposed to have perfect manners!” Her mother said loudly and cold.

“Rutschie is my invisible friend. He…” Josephine looked past her mother.

Don’t tell her that I am here.

“He visits me sometimes. And he made up the game of catching butterflies but it is cruel to catch real butterflies so we just pretend to catch butterflies, the most beautiful butterflies and I finished Utopia and Mr Thompson said I can read a book of my choice. I like Peter Pan it is about magic and adventures and a land called Neverland and…”

“Be quiet! This is all nonsense! I want you to stop pretending such ridicules things as invisible friends and butterflies. You are a Williams and Williams’ don’t pretend things. You are from noble blood you have to act like it. I will talk to your tutor, you have to read more classical books. Go now, I don’t want to see you anymore you give me a headache with your ridiculously. Go!” Elizabeth turned away from her daughter. The little girl left the room as told and as soon the door was closed she ran into the library and hid in the furthest corner in her favourite armchair. She was crying and mumbling. “Did you see my new dress mommy? And I got a new bow for my hair. And I have a picture for you, mommy, it is you and me having a tea party with Rutschie in the garden.” But there was no mommy that heard her. Her mother was talking to her tutor telling him it was totally out of line to let her highly gifted daughter read book like Peter Pan.

“Sssshhh come hear sweetheart. Anne is hear, would you like to have a tea party with me?” Anne picked up the little girl and let her sit on her lap.

“No-o.” Josephine cried hysterically. “Mommy hates me!”

“I love you very much Jo, exactly the way you are.” Anne whispers into Jo’s hair, while she was rubbing circles on the little girl’s back.

“Do you know that anne means in Turkish mother? It has the same meaning like mommy in English.” Jo whispered.

“Really that is nice.”

Jo looked up at her nanny. “Can I call you anne?”

“Yes sweetheart you may call me anne.” Anne pulled Jo into a tight hug. “And we now get you changed and then you tell me everything about Peter Pan. I heard he can fly?”

Jo smiled and went with Anne. “Yes he can fly and he fell out of his pram and met in Kensington Garden Tinkerbell, she is a fairy and…”

Josephine learned that there was no point in trying to make her mother love her, it was the last time the Williams heiress would try to play with her mother Elizabeth, she had Anne for her need of a mommy and Elizabeth as the strict governess she would see once a week to know if she is well behaved.


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